Poodle joke, Poodle humor

A large law firm places an ad in the paper: "Assistant required. Applicant should be able to type, prepare coffee and be bilingual." The next day, a dog walks into the office holding the paper in his teeth. "Are you here for the job?" they ask him. The dog nods his head. "Can you type?" He walks over to the word processor, sits down, and surprises everyone with 65 words per minute. "Can you prepare coffee?" The dog runs over to the coffee machine, instantly changes the filter and prepares a fresh pot. "Very impressive, but are you bilingual?" The dog returns and says, "Meow." 10 Ways a Dog is Better than a Man Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public. Dogs miss you when you're gone. Dogs feel guilty when they've done something wrong. Dogs admit when they're jealous. Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out. Dogs do not play games with you, except fetch. You can train a dog. Dogs are easy to buy for. Dogs understand what "no" means. Dogs mean it when they kiss you. These are the answers from dogs when asked "How many dogs does it take to put in a light bulb" Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code. Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp! Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry. Rottweilter: Go ahead! Make me! Shih Tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Let the servants do it! Lab: Oh, me, me!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I? Malamute: Let the Border Collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark. Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch. Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark. Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got a hangover. Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there! Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares? Australian Shepherd: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb? www.lilpoodles.com